Beware the Flyist
Impossible ideas are unfalsifiable
Flyism is the belief that we could save extraordinary amounts of money AND help the environment if we stopped traveling by means of planes, trains, and automobiles and instead got everywhere we want to go by flapping our arms and flying there.
And it’s true! Just look at how much money we spend buying vehicles and fueling and maintaining them! And look at all the pollution they emit! We could save so much money and so much carbon if we adopted the Flyist agenda! Their campaign ads promise zero-emission travel, and middle class savings of thousands of dollars per year! No more DMV! No more car accidents! No more Geico commercials!
Just think of it!
But the Flyists are forever frustrated, because no matter how awesome their idea is, the greedy evil capitalists and lobbyists from the vehicle-making industries refuse to let society implement Flyism. These condescending bastards smugly dismiss Flyists with senseless arguments like “that won’t work”. Who are they to say such things? Have they ever tried Flyism? Of course not - they would never let society try Flyism, or else they’d lose all their money!
Sometimes, a particularly dense bigot will flap his arms up and down vigorously, but not leave the ground. He will then declare that he has proven that Flyism can’t work. What an asshole! Of course what he did didn’t work - he didn’t fly! Flyism says that you’re supposed to actually fly somewhere , not just stand there flapping your arms like an idiot!
Real Flyism has never been tried!
The nerve of these people - acting like they’ve debunked Flyism when they haven’t even flown! Who do they think they’re fooling? Everybody knows that if they just flew places by flapping their arms, they’d achieve the cost and environmental savings that Flyism promises. How could they possibly not? The idea that Flyism could not work is so mind-numbingly stupid, nobody could possibly believe it in good faith. You’d obviously not need planes, trains, or automobiles anymore. You’d obviously not emit the carbon that vehicles emit when running. Anyone who suggests otherwise is so plainly evil that it would be foolish of a Flyist to bother debating him for even a second. Dismiss him as a Nazi and be done with it!
Conclusion
The irony of Flyism (and other unworkable ideologies) is that it is precisely the fact that it is unworkable that makes it un-debunkable in the minds of its adherents. The Flyist declares that a person who flaps his arms but fails to leave the ground is not practicing Flyism, and therefore has not debunked Flyism. But since no one actually can leave the ground by flapping his arms, no one will ever practice Flyism, and thus no one will ever prove its failure to deliver its promised cost-savings and environmental benefits.
And that’s why it’s useful to a certain kind of activist.
"Real Flyism has never been tried!"
Ok that actually made me laugh out loud.
"Flyist" sounds too nice. These people are toxic and dangerous.
How about "flyfools"
Or "mud pilots", for people that hallucinate of flying as they walk through the mud